I was devastated to wake this morning to read this article in the Toronto Star.
http://www.thestar.com/news/canada/article/1270262–b-c-victim-of-cyber-bullying-commits-suicide
Amanda Todd, according the article, committed suicide this week but, in reading through the published details of the last few years, including the video that she posted on YouTube just a few weeks ago, I’m overwhelmed by the complexity of Amanda’s story. There are too many clues in this room and, although school officials say that Amanda was being helped and supported, it became obvious this week that those supports were not enough.
Over a decade ago, I began working with the Peel Regional Police on a district-wide Cyberbullying program. At that time, not many people had ever heard of the term and many of the dimensions of the problem had, at that time, not been clearly defined. Now the term cyberbullying has become a well-used “box” to tuck away certain examples of unwanted behaviour. But, Amanda Todd’s story runs much deeper than this. In fact, labelling it as a case of cyberbullying sweeps so many other things under the carpet. For sure, technology has something to do with the tragic demise of Amanda Todd, but gathering all of the threads of her story and placing it “over here” as a case of cyberbullying could cause us to miss many of the other factors involved.
Some of these may be school-related, others may involve family and community considerations. Much of this seems so obvious to us–after the fact.
All of us who are charged with the responsibility of caring for young people need to take time to mourn the death of Amanda Todd. And then we need to take the time necessary to pull the threads of her story apart in an effort to build support structures that are even more sensitive and even more responsive to the pain and anxiety being experienced by so many in our community.
Easier said than done, I know, but what alternatives do we really have?
On the political pages, into the facebook pages, a common theme is emerging from the ordinary people concerning the suicide, and the actions, policies of the government institutes.
On one side, the wide use of anti-depressants being prescribed for children, and on the other side, the big boxed schools. The lost of the small community schools, and a society were health care is a prescription. Parents ( I assumed that they are just parents), are making the connections to the big boxed schools to the bullying increases to the lost of small community schools. The prescription is to give little Jane a pill, labeled her, and the school system model of consolidation, centralization, plus lover of big schools, have legally discharged their duties.
All the support structures put in place, in a highly centralized, standardization, one-sized-fits-all model of the public institutes that provides services, will make no impact until the same public institutes acknowledge their roles, their actions and policies that has led to the increases in bullying, the increases in stress levels of children, and right down to the increases in hyper blood pressure levels of children. The public institutes all blame the parents, patients, and whoever lies outside of the public institutes, but they never look within.
Stephen, you state all of us are responsible – but the public institutes has a higher level of responsibility because they are legally charged under the legislation laws to provide services and the delivered of the said services to the public. However, when services are delivered to meet the minimum legal requirements as written in the legislation, not to discharge their duties towards the public, but rather to meet the level of protection to prevent civil law suits and to protect the public employees and government from the public. The public that the public employees are there to serve the public.
Big boxed schools, are a curse, that has allowed the bureaucracy that is needed to operate the big-boxed schools in a centralization model to hide behind the curtains, Increase bullying, is one of the outcomes, and yet the same public education institute will fight tooth and nail to prevent small community schools under the size of 200 students. Remain silent, when small schools are closed, and praise the model of big schools to all other models in their loud voices. But ignored the negative outcomes of the students and communities on policies and practices of the big boxed schools that contributed to the negative outcomes of students.
In another week, it will be business as usual in the high schools across Canada. Nothing will change within, except for another additional set of rules, regulations and recommendations that is directed at the students, parents and the communities. Nothing will change, in another week when the next parent walks into the principal office, demanding that the school do something about the bully who is victimizing their child. Name calling and taunting is not the kind of thing that bullies are discipline for. An apology is only needed. Apparently, it is cool to be called gay, fag and any other gay adjectives by straight students, when the person is not gay. But not cool for a straight person to say to the gay student, any words that relate to their sexual orientation. Its okay to bully parents by the school and school board administration, who object to the new sex curriculum and other questionable curriculum material, and would like to withdraw their child. Its okay by the administration of the school board, to denied education services, and tell the parents if you don’t like it, you can leave. When the parent takes the advice and leaves to homeschool – they are now label with parents with questionable parenting abilities. On top of the current aversion of the public education system, towards any choice other than the public school kind.
“Easier said than done, I know, but what alternatives do we really have?” Really hard, when the public institutes that supposedly exist to provide and delivery of services to the public, are unwilling or pretends to listen to the public they serve.
Included a version of this video in classes. Mortified to get responses from grade 11s such as: “She [expletive] deserved it.” “Who gives a [expletive] about stupids?” “I’d use her boobs for more than an profile pic!”
::sigh::
Had other responses, of course; and I think many were quite impacted by our discussions. But not all classes are equal, and there are some scary narratives percolating in our schools – and saturating our modern culture.
So much work to do. -.-
I think the mistake is to take such comments at face value. We’re dealing with powerful emotions and teens that aren’t very skilled at dealing with them. What happened was terrible, lets not compound it with more anger.
At the same time, there is a reason to be concerned that comments like these are emerging. I would like to know more about Tobey’s lesson and how he chose to move through the conversation.
I included it in lessons for ENG 10, planning 10, civics 11, communications 11 and 12. One student had known Ms. Todd. That helped draw it in a little closer. In most classes it went great – good discussions, lots of awareness re. the proximity of bullying to all our lives (teachers included!). With that said, not all students are interested in those discussions, and some students are firmly implicated within them.
How did I navigate it? Gingerly. The biggest challenge was in planning 10 (which includes grade 11s and 12s chasing grad requirements). The focus of the lesson was on Myers-Briggs Typology Indicator, and I linked it with major life events that can irrevocably alter our personalities. When the … problematic comments began bubbling up, I started pushing the ‘commonness’ of the dilemma – i.e., lots of students have images floating about that could inhibit their chances at employment. Around then I had students showing off images on Google of them with giant bongs, bloody knuckles, under a pile of women, etc.
I’ve just taken on the classes, and am sharing them with another teacher. I’m planning on having a chat with her about their responses, and my next approach in planning 10 will be a whole lot more Shock Doctrine. Many of them have no intention of pursuing post-secondary education and haven’t a clue what’s in store for them. Grade 12s that can’t write a 5 sentence paragraph have a bumpy ride ahead.
I agree, and I would imagine that Tobey and others who encounter these reactions (I’ve seen some online) would use this is a perfect moment for some critical conversations. Teachable moments?
This emotional warfare called Cyber-bullying is difficult. Ultimately, this is a people problem, as opposed to blaming technology. I think that more awareness needs to take place, like a mandatory course in a well-developed media literacy program. One that is perhaps offered at elementary (not as a unit but a course), and another in high school. I sound like I’m grasping at straws here but our alternatives as educators are shrinking. It’s time to fight fire with fire. We need renewed cultural attitudes regarding this issue. Education and awareness is the only thing left.
It is beyond tragic,I cannot even think of a word that best describes my sorrow for the death of this beautiful child & my heart goes out to her parents.One phrase comes to mind from Hillary Clinton’s book,IT TAKES A VILLAGE,I used to think it was a ridiculous name for a book but its appropriate here.We have failed this wonderful child and most heart breaking of all is to realize her last moments were spent in the darkness of such an unimaginable sorrow.All that may have been needed was maybe sit with her at lunch,or maybe take a moment of our time and reach out to her,and anyone who would mock her,or make fun of her pain is simply a ghoul,if this is what any of you consider to be human,I for one am ashamed to be called the same word.kids can play halo and grand theft auto on an Xbox,kill characters in these games and not realize there is price to be paid for taking someone’s life or sit by and watch a child take his or her life and not do anything except taunt them.It is frightening to think there are children growing up without a conscience.in today’s society we can even bomb cities sitting behind a desk,send unmanned drones out to do our killing while we relax hundreds of miles away,children see us do this to other people and call it war,and I just think it should be harder to take a life especially that of a child.To Amanda’s family I can tell you that sooner or later all these people mocking Amanda will have to grow a conscience,and believe me,it is extremely difficult to do when you know you have done things that have hurt people,and that you are the cause of someone’s pain.i lived on the streets as a teen,and I have done things back in those days that caused so much pain to so many people.i was lucky, I have a half brother and half sister that are lots younger than me from my dads 2nd marriage ,and its their ability to love without question that has allowed me to grow a conscience.i know it’s only right that I have nightmares every time I close my eyes to sleep,this is the prison I live in all the time,and these people mocking Amanda will also have this to do sooner or later,and it is the price that has to be paid.it should be hard to hurt someone,to be the cause of someone’s nightmare,especially hard to take a life.iIt is people like those mocking Amanda that makes me ashamed to be called human,if that’s what they think a human is.To Amanda’s family I am so sorry for your loss,and especially sorry She couldn’t find a light in the darkness of such despair.